When coaching youth sports there are three rules I set for myself,
to help me, the kids, and their parents keep things in perspective.
1. Teach the kids something besides the sport--teach them
something about life. If by season's end everything they've learned from me stays on the ball field then it was a waste of time, and I failed as a coach--because they don’t
live on a ball field. Sports are never an
end in themselves, they are a means toward something more
important, a school of life where the ultimate lessons are how to conduct
yourself away from the sport.
Ultimately, what are the most important things a coach can teach?
Identify them, and teach them, using your sport as a hands-on lesson.
2. The game is never more important that the kids; it is made to
serve them, not the other way around. Make sure they understand their value not
just as athletes, but as persons.
Last summer after my 10U baseball team suffered a defeat
at the hands of what looked more like a “professional” 10U team, I sang the praises
of our opponent’s baseball skills, as was their due, since they completely out-played
us.
I then told my team, “But you know, if I never saw that team play
baseball again it wouldn’t break my heart. But it would break my heart if I
never got to see you play baseball again. Because you’re the guys I want to be with,
not them.”
3. Communicate with the parents, and make sure they understand the
importance of communicating with you, especially if there is a concern. One way
to state it very plainly: “One thing we all have in common is we all have a
child here that we love, and we want this to be a good experience for them. That can only happen when we all work together and communicate with
each other.”
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